i’ll never understand it, college admissions that is. Here I am…just about 18 years old, in my senior year of high school, and I am expected to decide my future. Not only is that ridiculous, but the fact that my entire future depends upon a mere essay or two. It’s absurd I tell you. All of this pressure and demand to decide everything now, at 17 years old, while still in high school, with limited experiences and relatively little responsibility. How am I expected to know what I will be happy doing 10, 25, 50 years from now? And even if I DID know what i wanted to do 50 years from now, my doing that depends on whether or not I get into college. Sure, there’s no doubt in my mind that i’ll get into college, anyone who wants to go to college can get in SOMEWHERE, but i don’t want to go just anywhere. I want to go somewhere that I’ll be challenged, that I’ll be stimulated, that I’ll be motivated. I don’t know, this whole situation is ridiculous.

But then again, maybe it’s just me. I have been staring at these applications for weeks, and when I finally sat down to attempt at an essay, it sucks, not only does it suck…it sucks majorly. I just can’t figure out how to approach it. It needs to be colorful, well written, well presented, and have a pretty decent topic. I just don’t know how to do it, or what to write about…

According to almost everyone i talk to, i’ll get into the schools I’m applying to, but there’s still the daunting task of applying. Sure, I may be a perfect fit for the school, but if my essay sucks, then i don’t have a shot in hell.

so yeah…now i’m sitting here, still staring at my computer, still wondering what to write about, and still avoiding all of the other work i have to do for tomorrow….

what a time, what a time, what a time.